----- Original Message -----
Sent: Tuesday, July 30, 2002 6:31
PM
Subject: Re: FlightWeb Group
Therapy
Hi Dan,
It's funny that you posted your concern when you
did - I have been formulating my own post along the exact same
lines!
I have a son who just turned two and I have
always found myself thinking of the worst case scenario. Not so much
disease as traumatic events... And it seems like every day. At
first I thought it was just the "new parent worries", but most of my friends
who are not in EMS do not share these visions nearly as often as I do.
All parents think now and then about some terrible tragedy occurring, for
example kidnapping or drowning - but these are probably most common
because of the amount of news coverage they receive when they do happen.
I think that the amount of time that non-EMS parents think about these things
is minimal. I think about them all the time, and like you, for me it's
not paranoia but kind of a low-grade annoyance.
I am convinced that because of the number of (and
intensity of) the events that we witness and partake in personally, we have
those events in the front of our minds when we have children.
Bad things really DON'T happen to most kids, but when they do a very small
percentage of caregivers are exposed to a high number of these events - that's
us. Sometimes for me it can seem like these things happen "all the
time" when in reality it is a small percentage of a percentage of children who
are seriously injured or affected by disease. Even if I'm not running
that many pediatric calls, the PALS, PEPP, NRP, PHTLS and other
classes that we all routinely attend make sure that I'm aware of all
the horrible things that *can* happen...
Pediatric calls are probably the most difficult
calls we run. Even before I had kids, the most vivid and disturbing
calls I ever had were with sick and injured youngsters. Sometimes I have
what I call a "film effect" after running a bad call: It's as if the
call was a movie that keeps running through your head after it's over, playing
the scene out again and again, sharp and clear. It plays while
you're trying to go to sleep, in line at the cafeteria, studying in
class, fixing breakfast, it just keeps popping up. When it's a pediatric
call not only is it extra annoying to keep seeing the film, but it's easy to
picture your own little one in the movie.
I think the experience imagining terrible
things is especially acute for those of us that work in the field (not
that PICU RNs don't have their share of nightmares, but it's a little
different receiving an intubated brain-dead three-year old from the ED than it
is being there when he or she is taken out of the pool). Paramedics
and flight nurses bear an extra psychological burden doing what they do, I
don't think there is any way around that...
I never really thought about my terrible visions
as post traumatic stress syndrome - I always thought it was something
that just goes with the job, like a sore back at UPS...
So, anyway, you're not alone...
Mike
----- Original Message -----
Sent: Tuesday, July 30, 2002 2:31
PM
Subject: FlightWeb Group Therapy
Hi
all,
I wanted to get feedback
from all of you regarding something that has been happening to me somewhat
imperceptibly over the years but has gotten worse the last couple of years.
I noticed after the birth of my first child (Haley) two and a half years ago
that I increasingly imagine horrible things happening to her. I do not
imagine me doing horrible things to her; I just imagine accidents, trauma,
disease etc. It seems like if my mind has nothing better to do it will find
some trigger and I will go off on some traumatic scenario in my head. I
don’t think it is a huge problem right now, it is
more irritating than anything. My wife thinks I am paranoid because I am so
protective of my daughter. I am sure that we have the safest home for a
child to live in. I have got cupboard latches, outlet protectors, and the
works. I have been in EMS for 15 years now
and flying for 3. I am sure this is a form of Post Traumatic Stress and was
wondering if this is a common manifestation. I have never really had
problems with nightmares or anything. I have had those mass casualty dreams
where I am the only rescuer there etc. but nothing that has really bothered
me. I guess I had this begin before my daughter was born, I would just
imagine bad things happening to me. I am glad that this is the only result
of all the bad stuff that I have seen; it could be a lot worse I guess. I
was wondering if any of you have similar issues or if you have any
tips/advice.
Daniel
R. Teasdale RN, NREMT-P
Flight
Nurse
Classic
Lifeguard
www.classiclifeguard.com
